Reflected in the fragments of his personality are echoes of Asian gay men who live in Western countries. People whose everyday lives becomes a negotiated and cultural amalgamation of Asian, Western and queer identities. Do we belong to either western or eastern culture? Are our desires influenced by our struggle for identity? And what commonalities lie within our collective psychological experiences?
The tension of east and west and some of its complexities are especially exhibited in our dating scene. In popular gay Asian colloquialism, there lies the cultural notion that desires revolve around two specific racial choices — rice or potato? This divide seemed commonplace, even manifesting itself within a speed dating event in Sydney.
Is BRO a dating app for straight men to meet straight men? - BBC Three
At the event, we were given 12 dates at five minutes each and no one was allowed to talk about work. Interestingly a lot of the people I came across were open to everyone in terms of race when I asked them. I wanted to pry even further though, so I inquired if there were any patterns or differences in their dating experiences when it came to dating either white or Asian men. Three people separately mentioned smell which I guess is fair.
A guy called Don told me he felt more comfortable with Asian guys since more of them wanted something similar in terms of a relationship , while Caucasian men were either interested in a hookup or seemed much older than him. Another person, Jason agreed with this and said that he preferred Asian men because they were similar in their traditions.
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Jason also felt that other Asian men were culturally more family orientated and more open to monogamy and dating, whereas western guys appeared to be focused on sex. As Eric continued to talk, he revealed how he became more comfortable with his cultural heritage growing up. It was during that process he became more open to dating other Asian men. Jason also recalled a similar experience. He believes some Asian men go through a journey where they discover themselves in life, and then are ready to date other Asians.
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In a sense, being able to attain this whiteness even through association through others marks a sense that we belong to this sort of class. Growing up as an Asian person in Australia can also be a disorientating experience be- cause of the bodies that surround us.
For me, this is supposed to be a safe space for men to meet up and make meaningful relationships. If this app is the thing that someone needs to open up about themselves, then great. We built up 32, Facebook fans before launch.
Is BRO a dating app for straight men to meet straight men?
Then, there were a few articles, like one in Queerty, which made the app into a place for straight men looking for other straight men to get oral sex in secret. There you go then. Most of the people I chatted to on there said that they identified as gay. People have called it an app for straight men because of the design, the logo, the name, the fact that interactions include 'fist-bumps'.
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But maybe that kind of behaviour doesn't have to be restricted to the 'straight' male community. After all, isn't that, in itself, just conforming to another socially-constructed idea of gender and sexuality? This app has caused loads of media speculation because, in some ways, it all seems so confusing.
People have taken it as an app for confused people. Maybe we're just thinking about it too much though. Maybe it's all pretty straightforward. Like BRO's mission statement puts it, a place, "for men that are interested in meeting other men… as simple as that". Like I'm doing it all in secret.
That's not because I'm a homophobe who doesn't want to be tarnished with homosexuality. It's because I'm in a happy relationship and I wouldn't want the missus or her mates catching me on there I think that's all it is, anyway.
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